Greetings and Namaste! I was recently invited by Katherine to be a part of your group. Thank you Katherine, and thank you all for having me here. My name is Sai, and I'm currently based in New Delhi, India. As a profession, I work as an Instructional Design Consultant with an American company. However, my interests are varied, which is nice in a way, but it also leaves me very confused about which one I should pursue more than the others! For instance, I love reading and chanting Sanskrit verses from the Vedas and Upanishads. I enjoy singing, that's perhaps my best way to connect with my higher Self. And then, of course, there's writing.
Like many in their late twenties, I'm at that point where my 9 to 5 job (which isn't always 9 to 5, it's more like 9 to whenever) tends to take precedence over all my other interests. But I'm trying to change that. I'm trying to give my art more space in my life. Like I used to, before I started a regular job.
I've always loved writing. I used to write essays, speeches, reports, research papers, magazine articles... all kinds of stuff, in high school and college. But the thing is that I always wrote for a topic that was given to me by someone else. It was only a few years ago that I decided I would start writing for the sake of writing, not for anyone else, but for me. I would write to give form to all of the thoughts, emotions, and insights that are constantly dancing around in my being, that sometimes drive me a little insane with their intensity.
My initial hesitation was fed by a fear that questioned, "what will people think of your thoughts? What if you make a complete fool of yourself?" My first few attempts were hard because I was writing what I thought everyone wanted to read. I was filtering out, judging, and editing so much that when I read what I had written, I couldn't see myself in there at all. So I would write, read, and then delete!
Then, I did something which is kinda hard to do. I let go. On one condition, though. I decided I would start a blog, but I would not share my blog with anyone, just keep it to myself. Having consoled my fear with that condition, I began writing as if no one was going to read. And then, the words began to flow. Once I opened the doors, they pretty much stayed open. I knew I had conquered one of my greatest fears, when I emailed the link to my blog for the first time to my closest friends.