Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Dear Diary

I have written in you for years
You have helped me with my fears
I have poured all I have inside
Things that I have learnt to hide.

You have helped me through
Confusion, through pain and love
I have found in your pages
All that I am.

My mind needs your help
To straighten out the thoughts
To unravel the tangled emotions
That are caught in its claws.

I trust you to listen to allow
Me the time
For in your world there is 
No time-

Just space and patience
A place where I can
Lay the past to rest
Bearing all of it 
Not just the best.

Your lines give me structure
To create a new path
You are open and welcoming
Like a loving old Aunt

You lay there waiting for me
Never pushing or pleading
Ready for me whenever
My heart is bleeding or needing
A release.

Thank you dear Dairy
Thank you for your peace

Learning to Appreciate Every - Brief - Moment

The hibiscus flower and its short life reminds me that all life is brief as are all experiences.

Hibiscus  is a relatively common flower that I've encountered in California and other places in the United States. However, in Puerto Rico the Hibiscus is the Flower of Puerto Rico and has some differences from the common flower I've seen elsewhere. They grow to a smaller size than elsewhere and are individual single flowers supported by a long leafy base. Nevertheless, I consider all of these tropical flowers wherever they are grown to be delightful. Knowing that the bud will open one morning into a flower that will last but one day, does not detract from their beauty. In fact, when the potted hibiscus blooms on the porch (as it did this morning), I remind myself to delight in this moment because in 24 hours this bloom will close and be gone forever. Isn't that an important reminder about all life and experience?

I'm reminded by the Hibiscus to appreciate the beauty of all life experience because each event is here now, and never will return in the same way. For example, our children are only young for a short time.  When the two year old innocence is gone, it is replaced by another version of that same child. Every stage of growth is wonderful and awful knowing that it will be experienced as both a blessing and another loss. The nostalgia you feel when looking at your children's childhood photographs provides evidence that this is true.

We have to learn to love, appreciate deeply, and then let go and move on to embrace the next moment.

Every difficult moment has it's own life expectancy, too. We should cultivate observing the gift in this transitory moment regardless of judgement. Breathe and notice.  This skill requires attention and a willingness to experience each moment in all of its thrilling (or frightening) beingness.

The hibiscus flower and its short life reminds me that all life is brief as are all experiences. It is indeed important to know this fact and to confront forgetfulness - to remember, I am alive. You are alive. What are we waiting for?  

Let us embrace this moment!

© Cynthia Pittmann 2014